When I was engaged to be married in 2001, I was having a heck of a time. No need to get into details here, but let’s just say there was draaama! My fab friend, Leslie, suggested to me at the time that I write a book about my wedding story, inadvertently sparking my big dream. From that day forward (yes, 10 years later!), I have been dreaming about writing a book. It was on my mind almost every minute of every day.
Photo by Vince Kusters
You could say I got distracted along the way with a number of things, including: a wedding and a new hubby, a move to New York City from San Francisco, corporate jobs, a move back to San Francisco, first house + first dog + first child + second child, a move to Charlotte, North Carolina (shout out!), and finally, a move back to San Francisco (you just can’t keep us away). I also did feign an attempt at writing a wedding book and a parenting book, plus, over the course of the 10 years, I have written oodles of “morning pages.”
Over one year ago, however, on a glorious Saturday afternoon, I finally sat down to begin writing my first book with the opening line, “I don’t know how to say this…” and I just kept on writing from there. Two hours later, I had to pull myself away from my computer, but not without staring at it in awe because I had finally started writing my book. My real book. The one I was really going to write. All the way ‘til the end.
Photo by JustinLowery.com
How did I do that, you wonder? What changed on that fateful Saturday that allowed me to really start writing? Aside from the fact that I actually sat down and plant-ethed my butt on the seat and opened my computer to do so? Well, a lot of things happened, actually. The short story goes something like this:
Writer’s block has, at the root of it, “block.” I went through a long and intense journey of uncovering my blocks, the memories that were stored in my subconscious mind that were holding me back in my life because of fear, anger, and lots of repressed emotions. And where did all these blocks come from, you might also wonder? Past lives!
We’ve all had so many past lives during which time we had dramatic experiences that are still with us. It is safe to say that I have been hurt, tortured, and even killed in many past lives for doing such things as: speaking my truth, taking risks, being a big shot and being noticed. When we have serious difficulties in a lifetime and we die without resolving our issues (hey, therapists weren’t so readily available hundreds and thousands of years ago), the memories and the feelings we die with are stored in our subconscious minds and they stay with us and affect our current lives in the weirdest ways. It’s kinda complicated, and at the same time, kinda simple.
It’s powerful work, digging into the subconscious, and it is the kind of work I did to get myself on track.
Learning about my Soul Mission and connecting with my Soul were also huge assets in being able to finally start writing. I’ve done a lot of work on myself over the past few years, and I can honestly say that I am a different and much happier person now than I ever was before.
And oh, by the way, I never took a writing class.
Ain’t life a trip?
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