Dear Kim,

As with most people, I have experienced tragedy.  I am 38 years old and married with two young boys.  We have a third son that passed over in 2008 as an infant.  It happened while we were in the hospital, shortly after his uncomplicated birth at full term.  He stopped breathing at the hospital, was coded, and lived one day.  No real cause of death was ever found.

I have been listening to a lot of Oprah’s Lifeclass and Deepak Chopra.  I definitely feel my Soul and I’m trying to connect, but I am at the beginning of the journey.

My question is: How can losing a child advance my Soul?  Every other concern I might have seems so trivial.  It’s as if I can’t continue until I get the “answer” to my “why.”

Signed,

Questioning

Image by Silvana Sotgiu

Dear Questioning,

I am so very sorry for your loss.  I am also so sorry that I cannot tell you “why,” but what I can do is tell you something particularly important about your Soul Mission:  You need to continue, even without the “answer.”

Your North Node in Sagittarius in the Fifth House tells me a number of things, one of which is that in this life you need to let go of the idea that only when you have enough knowledge can you move forward.

I don’t think you could acquire enough knowledge to make you feel better about this event.  At some point, you are going to have to make the decision to move forward in a positive direction, and, when you do, your answers will start to come to you.

I get the sense from the tone of your emails – and from your chart – that you are a positive person.  That is good.  Your Sagittarius Soul is the eternal optimist and it is your job, when aligning with your Soul’s energy, to channel that optimism and to keep the faith.

You may feel uncomfortable about what I am telling you because it is possible that, in your search for answers, you reject the answers that come to you.  I say that only because I see it in your chart.

I challenge you to open your mind to the idea that you don’t need as much information as you think you need in order to fully participate in the creativity of your life.  I also challenge you to believe that the “answers” you seek are inside you, and they will come to you as you do step back in.

Strengthen your intuitive listening.

Over-thinking, over-validating and over-analyzing the situation is not the way for you to go.  Let go of logic.  Find natural ways to relax your mind and access the peaceful place inside you that leads you to your intuition… which will lead you to the Truth.  The Truth might be something you couldn’t even put into words.

I know this is your Purpose from interpreting your astrological chart.  What I know from listening to my own Truth is that your Soul wants to be the One to answer this question for you.  It does not want you to hear the answer from anybody else.

Stop looking for the answers outside yourself.  Look for your answers within.  Ask your Soul any and all of your questions.  Take a long nature walk – every day – and go there.

Get quiet, ask your Soul, then be patient.  Your answers will unfold over time.

Always remember that your life is a journey, an adventure even, and your deepest discoveries will come to you as you live it.

Follow me now, yo!  Facebook!   Twitter!   How Can I Help YOU?   Find Out YOUR Soul Mission!

Dear Kim,

I’m a 52-year-old woman who has never found her purpose in life… unless it is to raise my four children?  I’ve only had a few jobs, but I always left either because I was pregnant or on the edge of a nervous breakdown.  Although I’ve read spiritual, how-to, motivational books (and anything else that comes my way), plus I’ve taken two online courses, I still struggle to figure out what will make me happy enough to stick around.

Like most moms, I am present in my children’s lives, but it is theirs and it seems to me I should have mine. After twenty years of being a stay-at-home mom, I am now faced with an almost empty nest (I have an autistic son who lives with us), a bad marriage (we haven’t slept together in eight years and I don’t want to), and a lack of direction.

Can you help me?

Thank you,

Stuck

Image by Josephine Wall

Dear Stuck,

Staying home with your children may very well be part of your Mission.  Without your specific birth time and place, I cannot say for sure.  In any case, you’ve done it, so certainly it was an important part of your path.  It just doesn’t sound like it, alone, has made you happy.

With your birth date, I was able to see that your Soul is a Virgo.  It sounds to me like that part of your Mission you have not yet mastered.  Virgo has incredibly high standards.  Virgo can bring order out of chaos.  Virgo is the nurse, the nutritionist, or the organizational expert.

With your Virgo Soul, your purpose in life is to literally get your act together.  Your Virgo Soul wants to help you take control of your life and whip it into shape.  It also wants you to work hard on your part of the process.

Confusion is clouding your vision, and you need to come out of the clouds, because nothing will change until your goals are clearly defined.  You need to build your confidence, as that will help you make some critical decisions.

You say you’ve tried self-help books and online courses in your attempt at finding happiness, and I say you have to do more. Your Virgo Soul highly values both physical and mental health and It would actively pursue information regarding that.  Sometimes books and courses don’t cut it, and we have to try other methods in order to make breakthroughs.

One-on-one coaching, EFT, or past life regression therapy are all ways to help you get in touch with what is really holding you back from living a life of purpose.

It almost always comes down to emotions – like fear, shame, anger and sadness – that keep us stuck in unsatisfying situations.  Get in touch with your emotions, work them through and release them, and your life will transform.

This is a big job and you need to take it on methodically.  Ask your Soul to guide you through the process of analyzing your life and to give you the self-discipline you need to work at it.

Your next logical step should come to you soon.  Take it.

Follow me now, yo!  Facebook!   Twitter!   How Can I Help YOU?   Find Out YOUR Soul Mission!

Dear Kim,

I sincerely want to learn my Soul’s work.  I keep experiencing chronic job changes and I’ve been laid off a few times recently due to underperforming companies and issues unrelated to my performance. I am the type who wants to grow with a company.  I’m educated and talented and dedicated to my company; it hurts so much that these broken job situations keep occurring.  Since the last job loss, it’s been 5 months that I have been searching and I am still unemployed.  I give attention to this 7 days a week, I interview regularly and selectively, and still I am seeking to find my place in a stable, ethical, successful company near my home.

I know that all the techniques in the world will not allow this to happen if it’s not what my Soul wants.  So, I’m asking you – and my Soul – what It wants???  I am open to hearing my Soul’s answers, but this has always felt like a no win, long-term wrestling match struggle with my Soul.  I ask my Soul regularly to show me answers in my dreams, my waking life, etc., yet nothing has come.

Signed,

Searching

Dear Searching,

I’m really glad you wrote.  Consider my response as a way that your Soul is answering your questions.  You had followed up your initial question to me by telling me that you had found and listened to a recorded call about loving kindness, and the importance of treating ourselves with kindness first and then giving it to others.  I told you that that message has everything to do with your Soul’s work.

This is how our Souls speak to us – the answers don’t always come directly in our minds, but things will show up in our lives that “speak to us.”  The fact that this call touched you as much as it did meant that there was an important message in it especially for you.  In order to hear our Souls, the most significant thing we can do is pay attention to our emotional reactions.  Whenever you are ‘hit’ with something, consider that a message from your Soul.  Our Soul’s answers are not always obvious, but they are always there.  We do have to stay really aware to catch the messages.

As far as your Mission is concerned, your North Node is in the First House in Sagittarius.  I think that addressing the First House issues is where you need to put the most emphasis in this case.

Your astrological chart indicates that you have spent lifetimes depending on undependable people, submerging your identity in the affairs and ideas of others, and sacrificing yourself so that others could achieve their goals.  Now you need to turn all that around – put the accent of your life on yourself, not on your company.  Living in the shadow of other people and trying to be all things to all people is not where you are going to find success.  Forget cooperation, forget teamwork, forget trying to please others.  In this life, you need to please yourself.

The tricky part in this is not becoming too over-assertive, or establishing a sense of self that completely shuts others out.  Learning to balance your own needs with those around you would be doing your Soul’s work.

Unemployment is a blessing in this case because the time alone can really help you to form that sense of self, if you use your time for that.  You say that you are working 7 days a week on finding a new job.  Can you spend some of that time on yourself instead?  Pursue activities that are meaningful to you, go in your own direction, self-nurture, do your own thing.  I bet if you do, you’ll find a new job faster.

When it comes to work, look for something that allows you to follow your own instincts.  Becoming a leader, an innovator, a pioneer, an entrepreneur, or anything that requires initiative and independent action is the kind of work that would be best for you.  Sagittarius loves higher knowledge and teaching, so perhaps you could go back to school, or if you are already proficient in a particular area, can you teach or distribute your ideas on a mass level?

Your Soul Sign indicates that you have the potential to be highly intuitive.  If you don’t feel that you are there yet, I suggest working on that so that you can be sure to keep in touch with your Soul as you pursue your next career move.

Follow me now, yo!  Facebook!   Twitter!   How Can I Help YOU?   Find Out YOUR Soul Mission!

Dear Kim,

I need advice. I know that in order to get to where I want to be, I must be happy where I am.  I’m 23 years old and I live with my parents.  They are very restrictive and they think that “where I want to be” is really a terrible idea (therefore they do everything they can to keep me from doing it). I’m stressed out and feel like I’m living double lives (one where I try to get my parents off my back and one where I reach for my goals in secret). What can I do to be ecstatically happy where I am?

Signed,

Struggling

cafepress.com

Dear Struggling,

At your age, I don’t think you need your parents’ approval to be who you want to be.  You may want it, but it is not required.  Your chart indicates that you want power for its own sake, and this sounds like a power struggle is going on.  An extreme, all or nothing attitude is not where you are going to find happiness here, but looking for a third option in this situation will serve you well.

Can you be ok with working on yourself and your goals without sharing it all with your parents?  I’m sure your parents want the best for you, but that doesn’t mean they know what that is, so don’t give up on your pursuits.  Finding creative outlets for your passions should make you happy indeed.

When it comes to dealing with your parents, take a step back and look at them objectively.  Understanding what’s making them tick – without judgment – could also be very intriguing for you.  I know you can read people, so do it, and act accordingly.

In your communications, speaking to their listening will be the best way to get your message across.  You will probably have to lessen your intensity and increase your patience, which may be a total act, but faking it works.  Doing this may help you in communicating with others as you go through life too.

Withholding communication and withdrawing emotionally probably comes naturally to you, but that would be extreme.  Keep in mind that extremism is not your happy place.  Continue to look for that middle ground.

Have you ever read Desiderata?  I think you could get a lot of lessons out of that.

When all else fails, take a bath with lavender oil.  You have a Pisces Soul, and that would be a great place for you to connect with It.

Follow me now, yo!  Facebook!   Twitter!   How Can I Help YOU?   Find Out YOUR Soul Mission!